Nigerian
model and singer Miss Sahhara on Transgender Day of Remembrance shared her
transition story and appealed to people to stop stigmatizing people like
him/her.
Find
her story below:
I
am standing in front of the mirror looking at my reflection. Tears of joy
trickle down my rouged cheek before going on stage.
I
am in tears because I just can’t believe how realistic my dreams have become. I
am a woman! Living m y life freely. Accepted and respected for my achievements
as a model and a performer.
My
fellow transgéndered sisters and brothers paved this way for me. They fought
for acceptance, understanding and respect. Some died while fighting for what
they believed in and others fell before their time due to hate, rejection and
society’s unfairness. Every single story gave me strength to fight on and never
to give up.
I wish I could tell the younger me who tried to commit suicide twice that life gets better and dreams come true.
I did not imagine life could be this amazing many years ago after being released from a horrid Nigerian prison for being different. Then all I could think was I could die in this prison and no one will know or care.
Being imprisoned felt justifiable, considering I was being punished for being ‘gay’ – something they assumed due to my feminine features and mannerisms.
I wasn’t gay, I am a woman born differently due to natural defects. What I felt did not match my outward appearance. Being assigned male at birth doesn’t make me a man or a woman, nobody was born a man or a woman, you develop into your preferred gender as you grow up. For me that gender was female. I was born male but my brain, gestures, features and carriage functioned as female.
Growing up and not knowing what was happening to my body made me confused and lost. I couldn’t discuss it with my family because my femininity was frowned on due to religion and I could not talk to my friends because they would not understand what I was going through. I found solace in music and dreams.
I dreamt of being free to be myself, free of insults, free of judgment and free from harassment.
That
freedom came when I moved to the United Kingdom, finding girls like me gave me
hope of not being alone in my journey of self-discovery.
Found
out what I went through growing up in Nigeria was quite common with
transgéndered people. Having freedom, acceptance and knowledge are the key most
important elements to a successful transition.
Knowing
I am not alone in my struggles helped me to reevaluate my views on life and how
I should go about my transition wisely. I researched my transition and
reconciled the conflicting emotions involved in the process of accepting myself
as the woman I am.
It
is a lonely world during transition, as your body changes so do your emotions,
which leads the mind into the darkest path in life. If the chemicals are not
professionally controlled, you can feel suicidal due to rejection from loved
ones and society.
In
life perfection doesn’t existent, but for me having the freedom to be my true
self feels almost perfect. As a black transgéndered woman I am faced with many
daily challenges such as transphobia, a complicated love life, poor career
prospects and racism. But when I remember my life history, these challenges
become water under the bridge.
That
is why I will always remember those who built this foundation for freedom and
knowledge. Also those who never got the chance to enjoy the acceptance we have
achieved so far.
Transgénder
Day of Remembrance today (20 November) is particularly import to me because I
have lost close friends to suicide and have seen many more wishing to commit
suicide as a final fix to their gender dilemma and rejection by society.
The
media is silent on the subject of transphobia and the effects it has on young
transgéndered people of today, because they don’t see transgéndered people as
‘normal’ members of our community.
Remembering
my fallen friends helps me to keep their memories alive. It also encourages me
to carry on the fight to be respected, understood and accepted for whom I am.
I
dream of a world where we are given some sort of understanding and tolerance to
live peacefully as able, intelligent fellow human beings who make positive
contributions to society.
Transgéndered people are human too. We are your brothers, your sisters,
your children, your friends and your lovers. Stop the hate! “
Watch Her Telling Her Story…
Watch Her Music Video
1 comment:
Hmm.... God is able.
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